I need to rant!

I need to rant publicly!

If you are in a happy, festive mood, don’t read on.  (Or do so, but be smug and don’t let me ruin your joy!)  If you are feeling slightly stressed, then read on and realise your worries are comparatively small.  And if you have genuine reasons to feel shitty this time of year, then feel free to swear at me, rant at me and shout at me to get a little perspective.  I know that our woes are small in the scheme of the wider world, but today they feel huge.  Either way, the brief update on my latest physio appointment will make you laugh (or squeeze your pelvic floor)!img_0993

For those of you that read my blog regularly, you will know that this Christmas is going to be a tough one for us, but this post is not about that.  Those emotions still underpin much of what is going on around us, but today I just need to rant and swear at the less significant!

There are three full days until Christmas Day.  And the upstairs of our house looks like this…

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The rest of the house is covered in dust.  Literally everywhere.  I think if I pulled down my pants right now there would be brick and plaster dust in there too!  The children are breathing in that dust (not the stuff in my knickers – that would be weird and all sorts of wrong!).  We are having to wash the bedding each night because of the dust.  We are having to hoover and clean and mop the floors EVERY DAY!  And just so you know, we normally have a cleaner cos we hate cleaning stuff!  We are not rich and too posh to clean – we just choose not to, because £30 a fortnight for a cleaner is the best money we ever spend!

But the house is house is too filthy for us to even bother paying the cleaner.

All our carpets are now dirty from the mess.  We will be on the borrow for a VAX over Christmas.  Boy 3’s clothes are in bags all over the lounge table in an attempt to keep them clean.

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(Incidentally this is the same table that in four days time is supposed to be laid beautifully and hosting an amazing Christmas dinner!)

Boy 1 and 2 and just slumming it in the dusty bedroom upstairs!

We all have coughs – probably due to the dust, but possibly just one of the million bugs that go round at this time of year.  I am itching due to eczema, which is definitely a result of the dust.

The boys have now finished at school and we are trying to find places to go to avoid being in the house.  Yesterday we went to my mums.  Today we went to the bathroom shop (again!) to pick up more supplies.  Then I treated them to the drive-thru McDonalds, which we ate in the hospital car park, while the baby screamed himself to sleep.  He then woke up to scream his way through my ‘lady bits physio’ appointment.

(Lady bits update – not much progress I am afraid.  Today I was given a new gadget to help and I got to try it out while the physio watched.  However there is nothing pleasant about lying with a machine up your fanny, electrocuting you, while your baby screams!)

Then we returned home and locked the children in the lounge for an hour or so. (A week ago the lounge was the clean haven in the house. The place we could escape the chaos.  Now it is not.  Now it is a shit hole, housing all the crap we are trying to keep clean!)  Eventually the noise and mess got too much again, so we shipped out to the Harvester for tea.  Yes, Boy 1 had burger and chips for lunch and for dinner! Boy 2 had chicken and chips for lunch and dinner.  Boy 3 had booby juice for lunch and dinner! And we have majorly failed as parents!

Tomorrow looks like much of the same building-wise.  So we will escape again.  I wonder where I can take them for healthy, nutritious meals tomorrow! Oh and throw in a Christmas food delivery (£200 worth!) and a trip to a not-so-local butchers to pick up the Christmas meat…it’s another fun day for us to all look forward to.

Oh and did I mention we also have a puncture on the car, due to a screw from the building work?  There goes another couple of hundred pounds! And what are the chances of getting that fixed on December 22nd, in time for our annual trip to the panto on Friday?  Slim chance I reckon!

And we still haven’t wrapped the presents. In fact, I would be very surprised if I can even find the bloody presents in amongst the mess.  You know how you get organised, buy early, and stash them away somewhere safe…say no more!

And the lovely Christmas cross-stitch cards I (optimistically) started making for the boys have absolutely zero chance of being ready this year.  The penguin has a beak and a scarf, but no body or head.  The polar bear is still just a template and a bunch of embroidery threads! I know that this doesn’t matter at all , and a lack of home-made cards will in no way affect our Christmas joy, but it pisses me off!

And my sister-in-law arrives tomorrow.  She will arrive to a house covered in brick and plaster dust.  She will have to sleep on the floor in the lounge – once the haven, now the shit hole remember!  All I can say is ‘Sorry TT’!

And…and…and…

Fuckety fuckety fuckety fuck!

(I wonder if swearing will be censored on my blog?  I remember once sending a work mail that got bounced back to me because I used a bad word.  I hope my blog doesn’t send this back to me.  ‘Computer says no’ and all that.  I am sorry. I don’t normally swear.  But today I will make an exception!)

And so, on this special day, a day when I have almost lost my shit, a day when my husband suggested cancelling Christmas (in ear shot of the boys!), a day when we finally felt the strain of the building works, a day when we ate chips for lunch and dinner, on Christmas Eve Eve Eve Eve as my lovely boys tell me, I felt the need to rant.

Thank you for reading and indulging me.

I feel a little better now!